I'm sorry, blog, I know I've been neglecting you, but all the other things I planned to write about will have to wait because of this.
Because I have committed myself to being a force of positive, happy energy (which is doubly difficult because of my name and because of the situations I somehow manage to find myself in), I made a lifelong choice to become like Buddha and to listen to the cries of the world when the world refuses to hear them. While I realise that this has made other people feel much better, they do make me feel worse, especially because many of them as of late hit so close to home. And, of course, Buddha didn't exactly seem to bother to preach about handling your own problems either (I've re-read his teachings so many times in my young life, maybe I'm missing those verses?), so it's enough to say that I'm plodding through my own troubles.
I've tried several attempts to soothe my soul. I've returned to breakfasts with the BCBP; I've bought and overdosed on camomile and jasmine tea (and infusions thereof); I've even brought a miniature Zen garden to the office. Today, after slinging these problems on my shoulder and trying to focus on work, I prepared to exchange packages with a friend I hadn't seen in months. The exchange was meant to take only a few minutes, as I had a report to rush and I was suffering from cramps due to the arrival of my monthly visitor.
Our items (a keychain from her and a letter opener from me) changed hands but right before I left, I gave her a HUG. It was quite unexpected, even for a spontaneous person like me, because what I really wanted to do was to say that I knew she'd having a tough go of it of late, and that I was feeling the same way too. But then again I couldn't think of any words to tell her (each person has her cross to bear, after all), and there really wasn't enough time to say them.
Strangely, although I was the one that gave it, that one hug has turned my day around. My body began to feel less tightly wound, and the cramping seriously decreased, which is rare because when I have my period it is a serious effort to even get out of bed. The printer eventually broke down so the report is unfortunately three days late due to the weekend, but amazingly my boss just let me finish printing it on Monday. I was able to get my mum to agree on meeting my cousin from my dad's side as she's in town, which is normally difficult because anything that has to do with my dad is a thorny problem on her side. And, of course, I found out that my friend was able to get by today because of that hug.
I heard from one of my classmates in high school that hugs have been scientifically proven to be therapeutic, but now I can see that random, genuine hugs have an incredible amount of power. Hugs are able to convey so many things that words cannot: I miss you, it is great to see you again, thank you, I understand.
(As for the other types of hugs that say, "Hey, I really like touching you," well, let's not discuss those types of hugs today. :P)
I believe hugs are magical and some of them can burst out with so much magic and positivity you just want to give a few out because it can't be contained. Hugs are easy and healing. I wish I had thought of this easy feel-good solution sooner.
* This post is a direct response to Milk.Blood.Ink's Hug Therapy. You always have my back, and my hugs. ^.~v